What Is The Most Important Part Of Sex?

Give people the chance to talk about sex and they will do it. We could honestly spend hours talking about sex, whether it is the best sex we’ve had, the kinkiest sex we’ve had, or our favourite things to try in the bedroom.

Couple in love

With all of these discussions there seems to be one key thing that we talk about, and that is what really matters in the bedroom. When we talk about kinky sex, it is important we have fun. When we talk about the favourite things to do in the bedroom, we want to make sure our partner enjoys it. So what are the most important things when it comes to sex?

Setting the mood…

Some people seem to think that you can’t have good sex unless you set the mood. They feel that playing some romantic music, giving your partner a long and sensual massage, before moving slowly on to oral sex and passionately fucking into the night.

However, some of us believe that you don’t have to set the mood to have some really great sex. Have you ever been simply going about your day and had the urge for sex? You’ve waited all day to have some sex and then, when you finally meet up with the person you’re seeing, you don’t have to set the mood because we are totally ready for it.

That said, setting the mood can actually be great for making sex better. Creating the right atmosphere can help your partner get in the mood and, when they are there, they will anticipate what happens next. That will make them wet as they wonder just what you will do to them.

When done correctly, the atmosphere and mood before sex can actually be part of the foreplay. It is a long game of teasing and is a lot of fun to do, especially when you see that your partner is desperate for you to fuck them and fuck them hard.

You can then carry on the teasing by tying them up and kissing your way slowly all over their body, avoiding the areas they really want you to touch. Try it out and see what happens.

Skills

Obviously, just jumping straight to sex can work for some people, but if you don’t have to right skills the sex will get very boring very quickly, and you might end up looking elsewhere to get what you want.

You need to take an active part in sex, otherwise it all feels very one sided and your partner is left feeling as though they have to put in all of the effort all of the time. This doesn’t just apply to when you are having sex, either, as many will find that they are the ones initiating sex all of the time.

Talking to your partner can be a great way to get ideas on improving your skills. It might be that they enjoy it when you give them oral sex, or that they love nothing more than a little dirty talk in the bedroom. If so, there is only one way to improve your skills, and that is by doing it.

If you have the skills in the bedroom that your partner really loves it makes sex a lot better and you might even find yourselves having more sex than usual. Try it out and see what happens.

Orgasms!

Ask anyone if size really matters and you’ll get the response of “no”, followed by a long list of reasons: “personality is more important”; “chemistry makes good sex, not a big dick”; and so on and so forth. We aren’t about to turn around and say that size does matter. After all, we talked in a lot of detail about that in our Sex Myths Debunked article earlier this week.

However, something that really does matter in the bedroom is getting the end results and achieving orgasm. Imagine having sex and never getting an orgasm, no matter what positions you try, and that your partner gets to enjoy one. Even worse, what if neither of you get an orgasm?

The problem is that far too many people are so fixated on getting an orgasm or getting their partner to come that they ruin the mood or rush things. You can’t rush or force an orgasm, and going ridiculously fast to get your partner there doesn’t help.

Instead, slow things down. Work on building up the tension and just doing something they really enjoy the feeling of. You don’t have to make them scream in ecstasy in the first few minutes of sex, and if you take the time to slowly build up to a really intense orgasm, it will be better for them.

The main problem is that some guys find themselves coming before their partner does, and what happens in those situations is that the man will then stop and go and clean himself up. For some reason, people think that sex ends with the man’s orgasm, but if you want to keep having truly good sex you will go back to your partner and lick them to orgasm.

The most important thing

For me, one of the most important things is getting an orgasm. It doesn’t have to happen every time as sex can be good without it, but if I’m seeing someone who can’t give me a single orgasm I begin to feel very dissatisfied and will go looking elsewhere.

As you can see, we all have different things that matter to us in the bedroom, and you might not feel that the things we’ve listed above as important are as important to you… so tell us what you think. What is the absolute most important part of sex for you?

Tell us by writing your thoughts in the comment box below. You could also check out the Escort Norway forum and see what others are saying there.

You might even have some ideas for future blogs for us. What would you like to see us talk about here? Do you want to read some sex tips or are you more interested in the dirty happenings of the world?

Lara Mills
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Lara Mills

Lara Mills is a writer who has four years of sex industry expertise behind her. Since she entered the adult industry, she has worked on the Escort Advertising forums, before moving into her current role three years ago.

Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.

In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
Lara Mills
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