When Dildo Creation Goes Too Far

Dildo creation isn’t as simple as we think it might be. Designing a dildo and bringing it to life are two totally different things, as what works on paper might not work in real life. You need to make sure your sex toy will fill a hole in the market, rather than just coming a novelty item for people to talk about.

Dildo creation: a small sample

Unfortunately, there are so many dildos out there that coming up with a unique and original good idea is tough. That is why we have ended up with some of the weird and wonderful dildos that you’ll find about below.

Got some better ones to share? You can use the comment box below or head over to the Escort Norway blog to join in the discussion. You could even tweet us with your favourite dildo creation.

The selfie stick

It was last year that people started talking about the dildo selfie stick. This is something you probably already know a lot about, as the item went viral. It claimed to be the first of its kind, giving you the chance to get a good look at your orgasm as it happens.

Personally, I’ve never seen the appeal in sticking a camera on the end of my dildo to see what happens down there, but to each their own.

However, a lot of people were left disappointed as the entire advert for it seemed like nothing more than a huge joke… but we expect that there are people out there eager to pay for this toy.

Gas masks and dildos

Some people have a fetish for those wearing gas masks. They find it is a huge turn on to see nothing but their partner’s eyes when they fuck them or are dominated by them, so it was only a matter of time before someone combined gas masks with dildos.

These gas masks have a long hose, but instead of being attached to a box, they are attached to a dildo.

Why? Well, we aren’t quite sure, to be honest. We think it is just a way of combining the gas mask fetish with a sex toy, and as bizarre as it might look, it works.

Dildo drones

Dildo creation is tough, but when you are the people creating dildo selfie sticks, it is a lot simpler. Their aim is to dildo everything. Yes, everything, which is why they created the joke dildo known as the dildo drone.

The ad for it below tells you that the dildo drone is especially for those who like to have their pleasure hands free. Instead of using your hand to slide the dildo in and out, the dildo drone will do it for you, leaving your hands free for other things.

Jackhammer Jesus

Some people like to combine religion with sex. Most of the time, it is just by using the cross and tying their willing sex slave to it, or by dressing as a nun and punishing them appropriately.

However, the website Divine Interventions really have taken the dildo creation that step too far. Instead of just giving you a sex toy, they are crafting their dildos to look like religious figures. Jackhammer Jesus is just one of them, but you can also enjoy Buddha’s Delight, The Devil, and even the Grim Reaper if you fancy it.

They even offer Shiva and Baby Jesus butt plugs. To be honest, we’re okay with the cheaper, generic ones.

The hoverboard with a difference

DildoEverything have struck again! It isn’t enough that they would create a dildo drone or the dildo selfie stick. They wanted to find a way to make your journey to work even better, and so they have headed to the dildo creation suite and come up with the dildo hoverboard.

It’s basically a hoverboard with a dildo attached to a piston to give you pleasure. As you move along it goes up and down under your skirt, making your journey to work “a lot more fun”.

Of course, even if this were real, we couldn’t see many using it. It would be pretty obvious what is going on under the skirt, thanks to the movement of the arm and the screams of pleasure you’d probably be letting out.

Bicycle dildos

Japan has become pretty well known for the unusual, and dildo creation isn’t any different. In fact, they have become quite adept at creating strange dildos that people really want to get.

The dildo bicycle is just one of them. The bicycle seat has a hole in it for a dildo, which slides up into the woman’s pussy as she cycles. The faster she goes, the faster the dildo slides into her wet pussy.

If you want to test your ability to balance and keep cycling in public mid-orgasm, then this is a great idea. If not, then this might not be the toy for you.

Inflatable chairs with attachable dildos

Of all of the strange dildo creation ideas that are going around, this is probably the most tame, but also the strangest. You can buy inflatable chairs to sit in that have a space for you to attach a dildo to them.

A lot come with a dildo for you to use, that you simply click into place and ride, but some allow you to use your own.

Because the chair is inflatable you can easily store it for those kinky moments when you want to sit down and fuck something. However, a lot of people are creating dildos with suction cups on them so that you can simply attach them to the floor or the wall and have your fun that way.

Extreme dildo creation

When you are designing a dildo, you should be creating one that people actually want to use. Novelty is great for making things for viral, but it isn’t so good if you want to actually sell products.

What kind of sex toys do you think the market needs? Will dildo selfie sticks really sell, or are we missing the point?

We want to hear from you, so use the comment box below or the Escort Norway forum to join in the discussion. Think you have found something more bizarre? Tell us about it!

Lara Mills
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Lara Mills

Lara Mills is a writer who has four years of sex industry expertise behind her. Since she entered the adult industry, she has worked on the Escort Advertising forums, before moving into her current role three years ago.

Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.

In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
Lara Mills
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